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Tabu
Guest
Dec 19, 2015
My bank account is like a waterfall. Just constant flow... of money going away. 💸🏞️
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Frank Sokoine
Guest
Dec 18, 2015
Why did the fisherman put peanut butter into the sea? To go with the jellyfish! 🥜🐙
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Stephen Mushi
Guest
Dec 14, 2015
Calories don’t count if you eat with friends. 🍰👯♂️
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Edwin Ndambuki
Guest
Dec 13, 2015
I’m not bossy, I just have better ideas. 💡😎
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Ann Wambui
Guest
Nov 25, 2015
My idea of housework is to sweep the room with a glance. 👀🧹
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Victor Kimario
Guest
Nov 21, 2015
Why don’t oysters donate to charity? Because they’re shellfish! 🦪💰
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Kiza
Guest
Nov 16, 2015
Why did the smartphone need glasses? It lost all its contacts! 📱👓
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Warda
Guest
Nov 13, 2015
Don’t make me adult today. 😬🧸
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Dorothy Majaliwa
Guest
Nov 9, 2015
I smile because I don’t know what’s going on. 😁🤷♂️
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Rose Amukowa
Guest
Nov 7, 2015
I like to pretend my dog understands me better than most humans. 🐕💬
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Salma
Guest
Nov 2, 2015
I’ve reached the age where my train of thought often leaves the station without me. 🚉🤔
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Salima
Guest
Oct 28, 2015
I’d rather be someone’s shot of whiskey than everyone’s cup of tea. 🥃☕
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Anna Malela
Guest
Oct 26, 2015
I'm not lazy; I’m just highly motivated to do nothing. 🛋️😆
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Betty Kimaro
Guest
Oct 26, 2015
I’ve started using my kids as weights. That counts as working out, right? 🏋️♂️👶
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Stephen Kangethe
Guest
Oct 26, 2015
I am so good at sleeping I can do it with my eyes closed. 😴😂
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Sarah Mbise
Guest
Oct 18, 2015
😃 Mood instantly lifted!
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Andrew Odhiambo
Guest
Oct 11, 2015
I wonder how many calories I burn by jumping to conclusions. 🤔🤸♂️
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Rahma
Guest
Oct 3, 2015
What kind of haircuts do bees get? Buzz cuts! 🐝✂️
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Rehema
Guest
Sep 27, 2015
Be yourself. Everyone else is already taken. 🧍♂️🤷♀️
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Moses Kipkemboi
Guest
Sep 25, 2015
This joke is a keeper for sure! 😁
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Nora Kidata
Guest
Sep 25, 2015
What’s a frog’s favorite candy? Lollihops! 🐸🍭
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Victor Kimario
Guest
Sep 25, 2015
😂 I’m definitely stealing this one!
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Paul Ndomba
Guest
Sep 16, 2015
I’m not late. I’m just early for tomorrow. ⏰😂
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Shamim
Guest
Sep 1, 2015
If life gives you lemons, freeze them and throw them at people who are annoying. 🍋😂
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Zainab
Guest
Aug 29, 2015
Life is too short to remove USB safely. 🔌💻
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Elizabeth Mtei
Guest
Aug 27, 2015
I don’t need a hair stylist. My pillow gives me a new hairstyle every morning. 🛏️💇♂️
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Francis Njeru
Guest
Aug 18, 2015
Running late is my cardio. 🕒🏃♀️
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Grace Wairimu
Guest
Aug 18, 2015
What kind of shoes do ninjas wear? Sneakers! 🥷👟
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Jackson Makori
Guest
Aug 13, 2015
😄 You totally won the internet today!
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Nicholas Wanjohi
Guest
Aug 6, 2015
What’s a ghost’s favorite dessert? Boo-berry pie! 👻🥧
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Kijakazi
Guest
Aug 1, 2015
Why do ducks always pay with cash? Because they don’t like bills! 🦆💵
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Shani
Guest
Jul 19, 2015
Why don’t vampires like garlic? It’s a pain in the neck! 🧛♂️🧄
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David Sokoine
Guest
Jul 18, 2015
My bed is a magical place where I suddenly remember everything I forgot to do. 🛏️💭
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Andrew Odhiambo
Guest
Jul 18, 2015
They say 'don’t try this at home,' so I’m coming over to your house to try it. 🚶♂️🏡
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Rose Lowassa
Guest
Jul 17, 2015
If I had a dollar for every time I thought about eating, I’d be rich... and probably still hungry. 🍕💵
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Sekela
Guest
Jul 11, 2015
I have a lot of growing up to do. I realized that the other day inside my fort. 🏰🤣
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Sharifa
Guest
Jul 7, 2015
Marriage lets you annoy one special person for the rest of your life. 💍😆
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Samuel Omondi
Guest
Jul 7, 2015
I wish I were a little kid so I could take a long nap and everyone would be proud of me. 🍼😴
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Rubea
Guest
Jun 29, 2015
I don’t care if the glass is half full or half empty. I’m just glad it’s not a shot glass. 🥃🍹
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Mchuma
Guest
Jun 20, 2015
My diet for today: 1% food, 99% excuses. 🍩🙃
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Latifa
Guest
Jun 5, 2015
I love deadlines. I love the whooshing noise they make as they go by. ⏳🏃♂️
Did you hear about the kidnapping at the playground? They woke up! 🛝🤣
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Charles Mrope
Guest
May 28, 2015
I run like the winded. 🏃♀️😮💨
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Muslima
Guest
May 22, 2015
Coffee: because adulting is hard. 😩☕
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Philip Nyaga
Guest
May 22, 2015
How does a taco say grace? Lettuce pray! 🌮🙏
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Rose Kiwanga
Guest
May 16, 2015
Life is too short to be serious all the time. So, if you can’t laugh at yourself, call me—I’ll laugh at you. 🤣📞
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Zakia
Guest
May 15, 2015
Why are ghosts such bad liars? You can see right through them! 👻😜
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Joy Wacera
Guest
May 8, 2015
I have a degree in sarcasm. 🎓😏
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Mwajabu
Guest
May 7, 2015
😁 Definitely my new go-to joke!
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Martin Otieno
Guest
May 4, 2015
😂 Sharing right away!
My wife told me to stop impersonating a flamingo. I had to put my foot down. 🦩😂
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Kahina
Guest
May 3, 2015
I love you with all my belly. I would say my heart, but my belly is bigger. ❤️🍔
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John Malisa
Guest
May 1, 2015
I hate when I’m singing a song and the artist gets the words wrong. 🎤🤷♀️
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Alex Nyamweya
Guest
Apr 30, 2015
I'm on a whiskey diet. I've lost three days already. 🥃🕰️
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George Wanjala
Guest
Apr 29, 2015
What do you get when you cross a dog with a phone? A golden receiver! 🐕📞
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Violet Mumo
Guest
Apr 20, 2015
What’s a cat’s favorite color? Purr-ple! 🐱💜
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Nasra
Guest
Apr 18, 2015
I’d give up sarcasm, but that leaves me speechless. 😏🤐
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Ibrahim
Guest
Apr 18, 2015
Why don’t skeletons go to scary movies? They don’t have the guts! 💀🎬
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Victor Mwalimu
Guest
Apr 17, 2015
Why do fish always know how much they weigh? Because they have their own scales! 🐟⚖️
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James Mduma
Guest
Apr 17, 2015
What kind of music do mummies like? Wrap music! 🎶🧻