Which vegetable should you never invite on a boat trip?

Nicholas Wanjohi (Guest) on May 3, 2016

I have a love-hate relationship with Mondays. I love to hate them. 😡📅

Amir (Guest) on April 22, 2016

I smile because I don’t know what’s going on. 😁🤷‍♂️

Mwanaidi (Guest) on April 17, 2016

I hate when I’m singing along to a song and the artist gets the words wrong. 🎤🎶

Richard Mulwa (Guest) on April 9, 2016

My brain has too many tabs open. 💻🧠

Patrick Mutua (Guest) on March 31, 2016

Brilliant! The timing was perfect! ⏰

Catherine Naliaka (Guest) on March 25, 2016

😁 This just made my day!

Majid (Guest) on March 11, 2016

Life is short. Smile while you still have teeth. 😁🦷

Mary Kendi (Guest) on March 11, 2016

I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised. 😲👀

Abubakari (Guest) on March 11, 2016

I always give 100% at work—12% on Monday, 23% on Tuesday, 40% on Wednesday... 📅😂

Betty Akinyi (Guest) on February 29, 2016

How do construction workers party? They raise the roof! 👷‍♂️🏗️

Diana Mumbua (Guest) on February 19, 2016

I’m not saying I’m Batman, but you’ve never seen us in the same room together. 🦸‍♂️🦇

Dorothy Majaliwa (Guest) on February 18, 2016

How do you tell a vampire has a cold? By his coffin! 🧛‍♂️🤧

Jackson Makori (Guest) on February 17, 2016

I’m not really a control freak, but can I show you the right way to do that? 😎🔧

Linda Karimi (Guest) on February 12, 2016

Life status: Currently holding it all together with one bobby pin. 💇‍♀️😆

Amani (Guest) on February 5, 2016

Why did the picture go to jail? It was framed! 🖼️🚨

John Mwangi (Guest) on January 31, 2016

I’ve reached the age where my train of thought often leaves the station without me. 🚉🤔

Majid (Guest) on January 30, 2016

I’m definitely sharing this with my friends! 😆

Mwanajuma (Guest) on January 27, 2016

I’m not arguing, I’m just explaining why I’m right. 🤷‍♂️😎

Mwanaisha (Guest) on January 24, 2016

Why did the tree go to the dentist? It needed a root canal! 🌳🦷

Joseph Kawawa (Guest) on January 16, 2016

I told myself I should stop drinking, but I’m not about to listen to a drunk who talks to himself. 🍺😂

Majid (Guest) on January 6, 2016

Coffee: because adulting is hard. ☕👨‍💼

Rose Lowassa (Guest) on January 6, 2016

I don’t need a hair stylist. My pillow gives me a new hairstyle every morning. 🛏️💇‍♂️

Yahya (Guest) on January 1, 2016

What do you call an illegally parked frog? Toad! 🐸🚗

Francis Njeru (Guest) on December 17, 2015

How do you catch a squirrel? Climb a tree and act like a nut! 🐿️🌰

John Mwangi (Guest) on December 12, 2015

Running late is my cardio. 🕒🏃‍♀️

Khalifa (Guest) on December 10, 2015

I love naps. Like, I literally love them. They make me feel better about wasting the day. 😴🛏️

John Lissu (Guest) on December 10, 2015

Absolutely nailed it, what a joke! 😄

Ruth Kibona (Guest) on December 9, 2015

If I had a dollar for every time I thought about eating, I’d be rich... and probably still hungry. 🍕💵

John Lissu (Guest) on December 1, 2015

I don’t trip, I do random gravity checks. 🌍🤣

Edward Chepkoech (Guest) on November 30, 2015

I'm not lazy, I'm on energy-saving mode. ⚡😴

Faiza (Guest) on November 30, 2015

Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts! 🦴😂

Sarah Achieng (Guest) on November 30, 2015

My idea of housework is to sweep the room with a glance. 👀🧹

Maneno (Guest) on November 22, 2015

When I said I’d do it later, I didn’t mean tomorrow. I meant next year. 📅😆

Mariam Kawawa (Guest) on November 17, 2015

Why do elephants never use cell phones? Because they can’t fit them in their trunks! 🐘📱

Joy Wacera (Guest) on November 15, 2015

Why do fish live in saltwater? Because pepper makes them sneeze! 🐟🌊

Latifa (Guest) on October 27, 2015

Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up by itself? It was two-tired! 🚲😅

Maimuna (Guest) on October 21, 2015

I don’t need a mood ring; I have a face. 😐💬

Mwafirika (Guest) on October 16, 2015

I don’t go crazy. I am crazy. I just go normal from time to time. 🤯😜

Biashara (Guest) on October 11, 2015

I want to be like a caterpillar: Eat a lot, sleep for a while, and wake up beautiful. 🦋🍴

Betty Kimaro (Guest) on October 6, 2015

If life gives you lemons, freeze them and throw them at people who are annoying. 🍋😂

Khamis (Guest) on September 30, 2015

I wasn’t born to 'just get things done'—I was born to confuse people with my nonsense. 🤯🤪

Jackson Makori (Guest) on September 30, 2015

I’m writing a book. I’ve got the page numbers done. 📚✍️

Alex Nyamweya (Guest) on September 27, 2015

I have a speed limit of 30 minutes per hour. 🐢⏳

Elizabeth Malima (Guest) on September 14, 2015

Dear math, I’m not a therapist. Solve your own problems. 📚🤯

Grace Njuguna (Guest) on August 16, 2015

Why did the invisible man turn down the job offer? He couldn’t see himself doing it! 👻🚫

Mary Njeri (Guest) on August 3, 2015

Why do cows wear bells? Because their horns don’t work! 🐄🔔

George Ndungu (Guest) on July 26, 2015

This joke is too funny, I’m sharing it with everyone! 😂

Vincent Mwangangi (Guest) on July 21, 2015

How does a penguin build its house? Igloos it together! 🐧🏠

Elizabeth Malima (Guest) on July 18, 2015

Why did the orange stop? It ran out of juice! 🍊🔋

Edith Cherotich (Guest) on July 15, 2015

😆 That punchline was epic!

Nchi (Guest) on July 11, 2015

Why do bees have sticky hair? Because they use honeycombs! 🐝🍯

Binti (Guest) on July 3, 2015

My hobbies include eating and complaining that I’m gaining weight. 🍕📏

Nasra (Guest) on June 30, 2015

Absolutely hilarious! Can’t get enough! 😂

Khatib (Guest) on June 24, 2015

My life is a constant battle between wanting to be healthy and eating cupcakes. 🧁🥗

Sultan (Guest) on June 11, 2015

Don’t give up on your dreams, keep sleeping! 😴💤

Rose Kiwanga (Guest) on June 1, 2015

What kind of shoes do ninjas wear? Sneakers! 🥷👟

Mary Sokoine (Guest) on May 10, 2015

I’m on a 24-hour coffee break. ☕⏳

Janet Mwikali (Guest) on May 1, 2015

I followed my heart, and it led me to the fridge. 💖🍕

Mwanaidha (Guest) on April 30, 2015

What did the duck say when it bought a snack? Put it on my bill! 🦆🍿

Nyota (Guest) on April 28, 2015

If I had a dollar for every time I got distracted, I wish I had some ice cream right now. 🍦💸