What dies but never lives?

Betty Akinyi (Guest) on March 25, 2016

I need six months of vacation, twice a year. 🏖️😂

John Malisa (Guest) on March 19, 2016

I'm not short. I'm just concentrated awesome! 👌😂

Ruth Wanjiku (Guest) on March 17, 2016

I put the 'pro' in procrastination. 🏆😴

Maulid (Guest) on March 13, 2016

😄 Perfect joke!

Samson Tibaijuka (Guest) on March 1, 2016

This is the kind of joke you don’t forget! 😂

Vincent Mwangangi (Guest) on March 1, 2016

😆 Can’t stop laughing!

James Mduma (Guest) on February 29, 2016

I cleaned my house yesterday, which is odd because we still live in it today. 🏡🧼

Maida (Guest) on February 29, 2016

What do you call a group of musical whales? An orca-stra! 🐋🎻

Maulid (Guest) on February 28, 2016

Dear sleep, I’m sorry we broke up this morning. I want you back! 😴💔

Nora Kidata (Guest) on February 24, 2016

I love long walks, especially when they’re taken by people who annoy me. 🚶‍♂️😜

Nicholas Wanjohi (Guest) on February 22, 2016

Chocolate is the answer. Who cares what the question is? 🍫❓

Ibrahim (Guest) on February 20, 2016

Running late is my cardio. 🕒🏃‍♀️

David Chacha (Guest) on February 7, 2016

Whoever said laughter is the best medicine clearly hasn’t tried chocolate. 🍫😂

Jane Malecela (Guest) on February 1, 2016

I would lose weight, but I don’t like losing. 🏋️‍♂️😆

Zubeida (Guest) on January 31, 2016

Why couldn’t the leopard play hide and seek? Because he was always spotted! 🐆👀

Patrick Mutua (Guest) on January 31, 2016

Why did I wake up tired? I went to bed tired. 🛌😴

Elizabeth Mrema (Guest) on January 26, 2016

If lying was a job, I'd be on a Forbes list by now. 😇📝

Michael Mboya (Guest) on January 16, 2016

Coffee: because adulting is hard. ☕👨‍💼

Josephine Nduta (Guest) on January 6, 2016

I love naps. Like, I literally love them. They make me feel better about wasting the day. 😴🛏️

David Musyoka (Guest) on December 25, 2015

Why was the math book always confused? It couldn’t figure anything out! 📘🤷‍♂️

Grace Njuguna (Guest) on December 25, 2015

What’s a pirate’s favorite vegetable? Arrrrtichoke! 🏴‍☠️🥬

Mwajuma (Guest) on December 22, 2015

What do you call cheese that isn’t yours? Nacho cheese! 🧀🤣

Mtumwa (Guest) on December 12, 2015

How does a vampire start a letter? Tomb it may concern… 🧛‍♂️✉️

Ruth Kibona (Guest) on December 5, 2015

Don’t make me adult today. 😬🧸

Brian Karanja (Guest) on November 11, 2015

What’s orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot! 🥕🦜

Edward Chepkoech (Guest) on November 9, 2015

😅 I’m still laughing!

Charles Mchome (Guest) on November 7, 2015

I can’t cook, but I can follow directions—so if I fail, it’s the recipe’s fault. 🍳🤷‍♂️

Mwanaidi (Guest) on November 4, 2015

What’s the tallest building in the world? The library, because it has the most stories! 📚🏢

Sharifa (Guest) on October 31, 2015

I’m not saying I’m Wonder Woman, but have you ever seen me and Wonder Woman in the same room? 🦸‍♀️🤫

Samuel Omondi (Guest) on October 21, 2015

Sorry, I can’t come to the phone right now. I’m busy being fabulous. 📞😎

Lydia Mutheu (Guest) on October 20, 2015

Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing! 🍅👗

Wande (Guest) on October 20, 2015

This joke was on point! Love it! 🎯

Elizabeth Mrema (Guest) on October 19, 2015

What kind of music do mummies like? Wrap music! 🎶🧻

Frank Macha (Guest) on October 18, 2015

I hate when I’m singing along to a song and the artist gets the words wrong. 🎤🎶

Frank Sokoine (Guest) on October 16, 2015

What does a skeleton order at a restaurant? Spare ribs! 💀🍖

Christopher Oloo (Guest) on October 1, 2015

🤣 Sharing this right now!

Grace Njuguna (Guest) on September 27, 2015

What did one hat say to the other? You stay here, I’ll go on ahead! 🎩🏃‍♂️

Mchawi (Guest) on September 26, 2015

If you want your spouse to listen and pay attention to every word you say, talk in your sleep. 🛌💬

Abdillah (Guest) on September 15, 2015

People say nothing is impossible, but I do nothing every day. 😴🙃

Fikiri (Guest) on September 5, 2015

When nothing goes right, go left. ⬅️🧭

Abdullah (Guest) on September 2, 2015

I’m sorry, did I roll my eyes out loud? 🙄💬

Issa (Guest) on August 30, 2015

🤣 Sending this now!

Stephen Malecela (Guest) on August 28, 2015

Sometimes I pretend to be normal, but it gets boring. So, I go back to being me. 🦸‍♂️💪

David Chacha (Guest) on August 10, 2015

I'm on a whiskey diet. I've lost three days already. 🥃🕰️

Jafari (Guest) on August 5, 2015

How does a lion greet other animals? Pleased to eat you! 🦁🍽️

Furaha (Guest) on August 3, 2015

Haha, this is the best laugh I've had all week! 😁

Wande (Guest) on July 30, 2015

😆 Laughing so hard right now!

Charles Mboje (Guest) on July 27, 2015

😂 I’m seriously crying over here!

Bahati (Guest) on July 23, 2015

I’m multitasking: I can listen, ignore, and forget all at the same time. 🎧🤔

Makame (Guest) on July 19, 2015

What do you call a boomerang that doesn’t come back? A stick! 🪃🌿

Ann Awino (Guest) on July 12, 2015

Maybe you should eat some makeup so you can be pretty on the inside, too. 💄😜

Stephen Kangethe (Guest) on June 22, 2015

I’m on a seafood diet. I see food and eat it. 🦞🍕

Edith Cherotich (Guest) on June 10, 2015

Why buy it for $7 when you can make it yourself with $92 worth of craft supplies? ✂️🧵

Peter Mwambui (Guest) on June 6, 2015

What do you call a sleeping bull? A bulldozer! 🐂💤

Farida (Guest) on May 28, 2015

My life is a constant battle between wanting to be healthy and eating cupcakes. 🧁🥗

Tabu (Guest) on May 27, 2015

My wallet is like an onion. Opening it makes me cry. 💸😭

Elizabeth Mtei (Guest) on May 21, 2015

If you can't remember my name, just say 'coffee,' and I'll turn around. ☕🙋‍♀️

Rose Lowassa (Guest) on May 13, 2015

How do you make a tissue dance? Put a little boogie in it! 🤧💃

Lucy Kimotho (Guest) on May 9, 2015

I don’t have a bucket list, but my fucket list is a mile long. 🤷‍♂️😂

Diana Mallya (Guest) on April 20, 2015

Why did the orange stop? It ran out of juice! 🍊🔋